Randomness

What's up Bloggers..

I am making this post for I am not sure what reason as I don't feel anyone will be able to help much right now. 

I think I have had to much time on my hands to think lately. But all of a sudden I feel really lonely and thinking of all the people in my life and which ones truely care and would stick by me through everything I don't think there are any. maybe have a few friend that really care,but where they are..?

So much has happened now and it feels like theres a dead end and there is no point in carrying on. It seems like for a long time now things have got progressively worse and they are going to keep doing so until they have completly beaten me down.

There has usually been some part of me which just wants to smile despite everything and that fears and wants things to go back to how they were, but even this tiny flicker of hope in me is dissapearing and I don't even care anymore. And that frightens me a little which is a good thing I guess because it means I must still have some hope left.